Polish Observations

Today I asked why the Polish dogs wear muzzles. I could assume it is if the dog is dangerous, but so far I have seen it on a Pomeranian and a golden retriever. A Polish student answered me that sometimes people have children, and sometimes they have dogs, yes I nodded emphatically, so far very accurate, and people are concerned with the air quality here. So sometimes people put on masks for the air quality, but they put them on their dogs as well since dogs are like children. 

He obviously misunderstood what I was asking, but I was pleased to know that people in Warsaw are putting air quality masks on their dogs. The muzzles as it seems is a way to protect your dog legally if anyone ever says it was aggressive.

I left work in a good mood as I didn't actually have to work, I'm just grading another teacher allowing me massive feelings of superiority all day long. I spent the majority of the day writing emails and reading. I researched the park I walk by on my way to work and discovered the mural of men with guns is more or less what I expected. It is a mural honoring the Warsaw Uprising. A 63 day depressing rebellion. It's depressing because while it was the biggest attempted rebellion during WW2 held after 5 years of captivity and gassings by Germany the Polish somehow gathered a suicidal hope to fight back. They lost but at that point Germany was losing too. In retaliation towards Warsaw the Germans razed the city. 90% of the city and culture was burned to the ground and anything of value was stolen and still remains in Germany. 

I walked home in a good mood, impressed by the Polish people for fighting back.Then I stepped in dog shit. We all know the feeling. You are hitting firm ground step after step and then you hit something slick and soft before you are back to firm ground.  When I was reading reviews of Poland a user wrote that there is shit everywhere. And it is true. You really need to carefully watch where you are walking because dog (hopefully) poop is not picked up by anyone and it is on every path, sidewalk, and grassy knoll. Upon research only one city in Poland has encouraged picking up after your dog. Apparently some say it is deemed as beneath them. And to be honest after reading the history I don't blame them. There are a lot of Germans in Poland. Maybe these little land mines are owed to them, an act of rebellion. 

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Faces of meth. That was a popular anti-meth advertisement back home years ago. Well Poland has faces of Chlamydia. They pretend like they are advertising an internet package, but it is most assuredly faces of Chlamydia. Close your eyes and think of Chlamydia personified. Not those gross pictures you were forced to see in health class, but who would you assume has it for sure if you were walking on a street?

Now open your eyes and look at the picture. Uncanny isn't it. That's exactly who you thought of. 

This man is everywhere in Poland. He was the first person I saw when landing in Warsaw. Blasted across tv screens was this man dancing around. I actually laughed out loud, perhaps from tired deliriousness, but really because who the hell would make him the face of a campaign . His hair is buzzed in the front, dreaded rat tails in the back. I will call it the Medusa mullet.  

This particular Clap survivor fancies himself a Polish reggae singer named Kamil Bednarek. Judging a white deadlock mullet-ed reggae singer from Poland who visited Jamaica once and made an entire album cleverly titled 'Jamaica Trip' is almost too easy. So I won't. I will just leave these pictures for your viewing pleasure.  

Photo from THE Jamaica Trip with his band Star Guard Muffin. I can't even hate on this. They look like a bunch of band dorks. 

Ah Poland. Where dreams come true. You can be in a band where you can look like you casually date hypodermic needles, play the saxophone, wear teva sandals, and still pretend you're Jamaican. Living the dream eh mon?

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Post Writing Clarification: My mom read this report and truly thought there were Billboards doing a faces of Chlamydia advert. It really was a data plan ad for phones. I also want to note I am not trying to mock this man himself, just the rat living on his head. That hair is a choice. And not a good one.